About a year ago I decided to do some research into my target market, mums, so that I could understand them better and write blogs and social media posts that they actually want to read. It turned out to be a really interesting exercise and I learnt quite a few things that have been really useful. One of the questions that I asked was ‘what five words would you use to describe how you feel now’ and the most common answer to this was the word ‘lazy’ and this was followed by ‘tired, drained and busy’. This really stood out for me as these women were describing their life as busy and feeling tired and drained but also feeling lazy.
This struck a chord with me as I used to think of myself as lazy and lacking motivation. I quite clearly remember being called lazy by a teacher at secondary school and this obviously stayed with me for a very long time and combined with other childhood experiences, triggered years of negative self-talk that had an impact on my confidence and self-worth. So, when I read about these women viewing themselves as lazy my heart went out to them, and I wanted to give them a big hug because I know they are not lazy. I know this is the case as the clue lies in their other answers, which were 'tired, drained, and busy'. How can you be busy and lazy?
This is why I believe laziness does not exist. Especially as a mum. When you become a mum your life changes and no amount of preparation can prepare you for this. You’re suddenly responsible for a tiny human, you’re exhausted from the birth, this is followed by weeks of sleepless nights, you’re trying to find your path as a mum, learning how to look after your baby and manage each new phase as they grow. That is a lot. You may return to work and you learn a new routine or you may decide to be a stay at home mum and are also learning a new routine as you navigate this new path. Mum life is busy, hectic, rewarding and stressful. You have very limited opportunities to carve out time for yourself and when you do it can take so much planning that sometime it doesn’t seem worth it. You are not lazy, you are just overwhelmed.
The word lazy is negative, I feel it invokes shame and implies that you are not good enough. It is judgmental and critical because it infers that that someone should be doing something when they are not. It can set you on a path of negative self-talk, this is what happened to me. I’d love to chat to the PE teacher that called lazy!
So, ladies, the next time you hear yourself describing you as lazy I want to STOP. Ask yourself if this is really true? Or are you just really fucking busy and you’re too tired to think about exercise and making sure you’re eating your 5-a-day? Give yourself a break, like actually take a break and have a breather because this is most likely to do you the world of good.
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