Are You Listening to Your Body? Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Energy and Cravings in Perimenopause

There is something I see time and time again in the women I work with, and if I am honest, something I have experienced myself too. It is a quiet disconnection. A sense that somewhere along the way, we stopped trusting our bodies and started looking outside of ourselves for answers. Instead of tuning in, we rely on apps, watches, plans, and rules to tell us what is happening inside our own bodies. We second-guess how we feel, override hunger, question cravings, and push through exhaustion. Over time, this creates distance between us and the very signals that are designed to support us.

If you are navigating perimenopause and feel like your body is confusing, unpredictable, or even working against you, I want to gently offer a different perspective. Your body is not broken. It is communicating. The challenge is that many of us have lost the ability to recognise and trust those messages.

Are You Listening to Your Body, or Overriding It?

During perimenopause, hormonal fluctuations can affect energy, appetite, mood, and sleep. These changes can feel unsettling, especially if your body no longer responds in the way it used to. It is completely understandable that many women feel out of control during this time.

However, what I often see is not a lack of control, but a lack of connection. Many women have spent years following external rules around food and health, which means internal cues like hunger and fullness have been ignored or overridden. When these cues become louder, they can feel unfamiliar or even uncomfortable. Instead of recognising them as helpful signals, they are often seen as problems to fix.

Hunger becomes something to suppress, cravings become something to resist, and fatigue becomes something to push through. But these experiences are not signs that something has gone wrong. They are signals from your body, asking for attention.

Cravings Are Not a Lack of Willpower

Cravings are one of the most misunderstood experiences, particularly during perimenopause. They are often framed as a sign of failure or a lack of discipline. Many women I speak to feel frustrated with themselves when cravings show up, believing they should have more control.

In reality, cravings are not a lack of willpower. They are a form of communication.

For example, if you find yourself craving something sweet in the late afternoon or evening, it may not be about sugar itself. It may be that you have not eaten enough during the day, or your meals have not contained enough protein, fats, or fibre to keep your blood sugar stable. Your body is asking for quick energy because it needs fuel.

If you are craving something crunchy or salty, it could be linked to stress, fatigue, or simply needing something more satisfying than what you have eaten so far.

This is where nourishment comes in, not restriction.

Instead of trying to ignore or override cravings, it can be helpful to ask, “Have I actually eaten a balanced meal today?” A nourishing meal might look like grilled chicken or salmon with roasted vegetables and a portion of whole grains such as quinoa or brown rice. It could be a bowl with lentils, roasted sweet potato, avocado, leafy greens, and a drizzle of olive oil. It might be eggs on wholegrain toast with avocado and spinach.

These meals provide protein, fibre, healthy fats, and carbohydrates, which work together to keep energy levels stable and reduce the intensity of cravings later on.

Sometimes, even after eating well, cravings still show up. That does not mean you have done anything wrong. It may be linked to stress, emotions, or simply habit. In those moments, the goal is not to be perfect. It is to respond with awareness rather than judgement.

Tiredness Is Not Always About Sleep

Feeling constantly tired is something many women in perimenopause experience. While disrupted sleep is a significant factor, it is not the only one. Tiredness is not always just about how many hours you slept. It can also be linked to how well you have fuelled your body.

If you are skipping meals, eating very little, or going long periods without food, your body will struggle to maintain steady energy levels. This can lead to fatigue, irritability, brain fog, and that familiar mid-afternoon slump.

For example, if breakfast is just a coffee and lunch is light or rushed, it is no surprise that energy crashes later in the day. Your body is trying to catch up.

Adding in more substantial, balanced meals can make a significant difference. A breakfast with protein, such as eggs with wholegrain toast and avocado, or Greek yoghurt with nuts, seeds, and berries, can help set you up for the day. A lunch that includes protein, fibre, and fats will support more stable energy into the afternoon.

Food is not something to restrict or earn. It is something that supports you.

When Technology Disconnects Us from Ourselves

We live in a world where technology can track almost everything, from steps and calories to heart rate and sleep quality. While these tools can be useful, they can also pull us away from our own internal awareness.

I experienced this personally with sleep tracking. For a long time, I wore a smartwatch that gave me a score each morning based on how well I had slept. I found myself relying on that number to tell me how I should feel. If the score was low, I assumed I had slept badly, even if I actually felt fine.

When I stopped using the watch, I began to pay attention to how I genuinely felt when I woke up. Some mornings I felt rested, and some mornings I did not, but my perception was based on my experience rather than a number. Over time, I realised that I felt more relaxed about my sleep, and interestingly, I began to sleep better.

There are also apps now that can analyse your meals from a photo and tell you how healthy they are or how much protein they contain. While this might seem helpful, it raises important questions about accuracy and reliance. When we depend on external tools to tell us whether we are eating well, we move further away from understanding our own needs.

Hunger Is Not the Enemy

Hunger has been given a negative reputation, particularly in diet culture. Many women have been taught that feeling hungry is something to avoid or ignore. However, hunger is a normal and essential biological signal. It is your body’s way of telling you that it needs energy.

Learning to recognise and respond to hunger can feel challenging if you have spent years ignoring it. This is where the hunger scale can be helpful.

On this scale, a level 1 represents extreme hunger, where you may feel weak or dizzy. A level 2 is very hungry, often accompanied by irritability and strong stomach growling. A level 3 is when you are clearly hungry and your stomach may be starting to growl. A level 4 is the early signs of hunger, where you are beginning to feel ready to eat. A level 5 is neutral, where you feel neither hungry nor full. A level 6 is comfortably satisfied, where you feel pleasantly full. Levels 7 to 10 represent increasing levels of fullness, from slight discomfort to feeling overly full or even sick.

In practice, this might look like noticing that you are starting to lose concentration mid-morning and realising you are at a level 3 or 4, rather than waiting until you feel shaky and irritable at a level 1 or 2. It might mean finishing your meal when you feel satisfied, rather than continuing to eat because the food is there or because you feel you should.

If you often find yourself either skipping meals and becoming overly hungry or eating past fullness, this is not a failure. It is a sign that your body and your awareness need time to reconnect.

Understanding Hunger Versus “Peckishness”

Many women describe feeling “peckish” and are unsure whether this means they should eat. This feeling can sit somewhere between physical hunger and emotional or habitual eating.

A helpful starting point is to pause and check in. You might ask yourself, “Would I eat a proper meal right now?” If the answer is yes, it is likely hunger. If the answer is no, it may be something else.

For example, if you are reaching for snacks shortly after a meal, it might be that the meal did not contain enough protein or fats to keep you satisfied. Alternatively, it might be that you are tired, bored, or in need of a break.

Again, this is not about getting it right every time. It is about learning to recognise patterns and respond in a way that supports you.

You Are Not the Problem

The messaging directed at women in midlife is often oversimplified and, quite frankly, misleading. You may have seen claims about “flipping a switch” in your body to melt stubborn menopausal belly fat, or promises of quick fixes that target hormones in a matter of days.

This kind of messaging is not only unrealistic, it is disrespectful.

It reduces the complexity of the female body to something that can be “fixed” with a simple hack, and when those promises do not deliver, women are left feeling like they are the problem.

You are not the problem. Your body is not broken, and it does not need a magic switch. It needs support, nourishment, and understanding. Women deserve the full picture, not oversimplified explanations designed to sell a product or programme.

Your body is adapting to change. It is responding to hormonal shifts, lifestyle demands, stress, and the environment around you. When we begin to see it through this lens, it becomes something to work with, not fight against.

Rebuilding Trust with Your Body

Rebuilding trust with your body can feel overwhelming, especially if you have spent years following external rules. Being told to “just listen to your body” can feel vague and unhelpful if you are not sure what that actually means.

A good starting point is to keep things simple and practical. Begin by noticing your hunger before meals. Ask yourself where you might be on the hunger scale. You do not need to get it exactly right, but simply becoming aware is a powerful first step.

Focus on building balanced meals that include protein, fibre, healthy fats, and carbohydrates. This will help your body feel more stable and reduce the intensity of hunger and cravings.

Pay attention to how you feel after eating. Do you feel satisfied, energised, still hungry, or overly full? This is valuable information that helps you learn what works for your body.

You might also choose to step back from one external tool, such as tracking apps or devices, and see how it feels to rely more on your own cues.

Most importantly, approach this process with kindness. There is no perfect way to do this, and there is no expectation to get it right all the time. This is about rebuilding a relationship, not following another set of rules.

Are You Listening to Your Body?

If there is one message I want you to take from this blog, it is this: your body is on your side. Even when it feels different, unpredictable, or frustrating, it is still working for you.

You are not lacking willpower. You are not failing. You are navigating a stage of life that requires a different kind of support and understanding.

The question is not whether your body is functioning correctly. The question is whether you are listening to your body. If you feel like you have lost that connection, please know that you are not alone, and it is something you can rebuild.

Ready to Feel More in Control Again?

If this resonates with you and you are tired of second-guessing your body, I would love to support you.

You do not need another plan, another set of rules, or another quick fix. What you need is clarity, confidence, and a way of eating that actually works for you and your life.

I offer a complimentary clarity call where we can talk through what you are struggling with, what you need, and how I can support you in finding your “forever way of eating”.

You will leave the call feeling clearer, more supported, and with a better understanding of your next steps. You can book your complimentary clarity call here.